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Top Gear?

I've been told that

It used to be said,

'Get a hat, young man, to get ahead.'

Not a toff's top-hat, crafted from silk,

But some natty titfer -

And all of that ilk.

Once, one's social standing

Was made clear by a hat -

The Bowler, the Homburg, the

Trilby -

Then, at last, the poor man's cap -

Threadbare, misshapen and filthy.

Today, there's the ubiquitous Baseball Cap -

Our egalitarian, 'one-size-fits-all'.

What adorns it, must be said,

Are logos and slogans

That can't quite be read.

Are those more important

Than what's going on inside

Their wearer's head?

Finally, of course, there's our

Great British Crown -

Symbol of both State and Nation -

That bestows on beings

Who temporally bear it,

Equal ridicule and adulation...

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