Why, How and If

You might ask yourself why? why does she give it all away?

Is she not full of regrets the next day? and I can promise you this:

it is just simple as it is. whatever you give away, will come back to you the next day.

it will lift you up to the sky and you will just simply ask yourself why?

why did I not give any more and get even more for?

You might ask yourself how? how can she always keep on doing all these things?

how can she generate all the strength?

and I can promise you this: the power is not all in me. but I want to define who I might be.

so I just simply believe in all that I do

and this gives me the strength that can be seen by you.

and I don’t feel strong all the time. but at least what I do and why - this decision is mine.

You might ask yourself if? if I am not full of fear and how I can manage to smile without a tear?

and I can promise you this: I am full of pain, my tears flow gently like summer rain.

I cry and sob and moan and hardly ever find the right tone - to express what is inside my soul and

how much I wish to be whole. healed and hold by the divine. yes you are right, I don’t feel fine.

But yet I don’t give up.

I keep on giving

I keep on doing

Despite the pain - I want my living.