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Writer's pictureAlice Carroll

Time Will Tell - Revisited

Updated: Feb 27




Introduction On January 18th, I posted the first two verses of a poem that addressed the topic of time. I invited fellow poets to make suggestions to improve the readability.  One person made lots of suggestions.  All suggestions were much appreciated, though I didn’t have time to make all the changes.

  

A child learns to tell time

 

Oh, Mommy dear, I sadly fear

I failed telling time in school this year.

The teacher showed us how to tell time

Using an old clock that runs 10 minutes behind.

Teacher called the long and short arrows, “hands. ”I was completely confused.

“Why can’t we go digital?” I whined.

Teacher was not amused.

 

A Parkie tests for decline in cognition                                                                                                                                                                                                                   

Oh, daughter dear, I sadly fear

I failed my cognition test.

I missed the section about time.

And didn’t do well on the rest.

I was to draw a clock face with the hands set at two

My mind froze as if I had writer’s block.

Instead, a smiley face I drew.

I asked, “May we use a digital clock?”  

 

When asked” What is today’s day of the week?”.

I chose the right one after only three tries.

My cognition score looked quite bleak.

The tester was sighing and rolling her eyes.

She asked me the year and I guessed, “1980?”

But that wasn’t in the right decade or century.

I try to be funny but there goes my memory.

 

I could tell by the grimace on the tester’s face,

I seem to be losing this race.


A Parkie caregiver’s take on tests for decline in cognition


Oh, tester of cognition dear, I sadly fear My Parkie failed your test.

Her lowest score was on reading time. A horologist she is not.

She takes her cues from the Telly rather than a clock.

After church services airs, she knows it’s Sunday noon,

and lunch will follow soon.

The whole house has gone digital.

even the clocks, if that’s possible!

 

My Parkie takes two naps daily.

Each time she wakes up it’s a new day, lately.

She said it is 1980. That was the year we wed.

“As good of a year as any,” she might have said.

Some of her answers you may think rude.

She has always had a cheerful attitude.

It’s no rumor, My Parkie has a sense of humor.





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6 Comments


Well read. Many thanks, Martin.

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Unknown member
Feb 09

This reworking is great. Well done

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Replying to

Thank you and thank you.

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Well done Alice. It was good to start with but I love the additions. A poignant poem which manages to convey sadness and humour simultaneously - no mean feat. I particularly like the last verse and the eighties was one of the best decades.

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interesting structure, could be read in many different ways. i like it and the humour which all us Parkyites need to embrace. made me smile, thank you

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You are most welcome. If reading the poem brought a smile to you, then mission accomplished.

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